Thursday, May 2, 2013

Confession #46 - The Invisible Girl

Remember The Breakfast Club..."Don't you forget about me...."?  This was the quintessential 80's teen movie and most of us 80's kids can relate to it.  This movie had 80's high school pegged, you were either a Clair, the popular princess, a Bender, the burn-out, an Andy, a good-looking jock, a Brian, the brain, or you were like me an Allison; basically invisible.  See if you didn't fit in the other four categories, the other kids, well they just didn't see you, it was as if you didn't even exist. 

That was pretty much my high school experience.  The invisible girl.  Nobody ever saw me.  Oddly, I thought those days were behind me, but not so much.  It's been 25 years since I've graduated and sadly, nothing has changed.  Here's what I mean, yesterday I reached out to a former classmate on facebook, someone to whom I was friendly with until I suddenly became invisible when she somehow broke the barrier and made the "in" crowd.  Believing that 25 years had bridged the gap I made myself vulnerable and put out a friendly hello, which of course went completely  unacknowledged. Perhaps you can tell, I was a bit miffed.  All those feelings of being an outcast, ignored, and invisible came back to the surface.  But God is so good because He's seen fit to use it to help me embrace my invisibility.

The Bible says, "So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Cor 4:18.  Me, you, and those who were a part of the "in" crowd, we're all temporary and one day we will all cease to exist in this world.  But God, on the other hand, He is eternal.  We need to fix our eyes on our unseen God and on the heavenly realms and not on our visible selves, our friends, or people from our past.  Because when we pass away, if we are saved, we will live with Him forever.   This life is only a few years of our lives in comparison to the endless time we will spend in heaven.

Additionally, God has reminded me that honestly, I'm happy to be invisible these days.  To tell the truth it's been my prayer to radiate Jesus so that when people look at me they don't see Joanne, they see Jesus.  I'd rather be invisible to the human world in order to Glorify God than to be what others may want me to be just to be visible or recognizable to the world.  I wonder just how many notable people in today's society really feel fulfilled by their notoriety? 

I used to hate the fact that I would blend into the scenery, but today I'll blend into the scenery of the glory of God and shine His eternal goodness with joy. 

Ever feel invisible yourself?  Ever wished you would be noticed?  Perhaps you should rethink that for a moment remembering that when we are visible God is not.

Dear Heavenly Father, thank you that I can embrace my past and deal with these stirred up emotions in a way that reminds me to Glorify you Lord.  I pray for my sisters-in-Christ who may feel similar to me and ask Father that they would glean comfort in knowing that if they are invisible you are visible through them.  Bring them a tremendous blessing for desiring invisibility in order to help others see you.  In Jesus' name I pray Amen.

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