Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Confession #52 - And the Gold Medal Goes To....Me!

And the Gold Medal goes to ..........."Joanne Cuchel". 

I'm not naturally athletic but if jumping to conclusions were an Olympic Sport I'd be taking home the Gold.  Usually when someone rubs me the wrong way,slightly irritated by another, or I feel mistreated I reach for my conclusion pole vault and jump myself right into a mess! 

God has been bringing this issue to light and so it calls for a confession.  Normally, I tend to read-between-the-lines and invent meaning and intentions that people have towards me that are not necessarily true.  I love to play detective by picking up context clues and deducing motives and theories that certain people are against me, don't like me, or are jealous of me.  Then what's worse, sometimes I'll go and tell a few people to recruit them into my army of sympathetic supporters.  These supporters are appalled at what so-and-so did, said or is planning to do to me.  And then I rub my hands together while laughing maniacally as I see my evil plot unfold.  Not really...but if you think about it, what I am doing is evil.  I'm allowing Satan to use me as his filthy pawn to cause strife.

Inevitably a few days later the smoke clears, I calm down and find out or realize that there was so little merit in my conclusion.  So-and-so didn't have it in for me.  And I just told the whole world what they did.....then I hang my head in shame when I realize what I've done and the damage my conclusion jumping may have caused. 

Yes part of the reason I'm a dirty christian woman is because I keep landing in huge piles of mud whenever I jump to conclusions.  But the worse part is I hardly ever go back to that army of sympathizers and clean the slate.  I fail to explain just what a dufus I am.  I don't confess that instead of being a master sleuth like Sherlock Holmes or Hercule Poirot I'm more like Inspector Clouseau; a bumbling idiot.

Will I ever learn that conclusions are nothing more that theories based on hearsay instead of fact?  And how can I be a woman who stands on truth, the Bible, if I continue trusting in lies?

Conclusions can be relationship killers and will block us from moving forward in our walk with God.  God's word tells us, "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." Romans 12:18.  I'm certainly not living at peace if I'm causing strife. 

God warns us about this in Proverbs, "The lips of fools bring them strife, and their mouths invite a beating." Proverbs 18:6 and in 20:3 it says, "It is to one’s honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel"

So I can pretty much add fool to my resume as long as I continue jumping to conclusions and gaining sympathetic supporters.  Been there?  Done that? Please pray with me:

Dear Heavenly Father, I am truly sorry for my actions.  Believing in and spreading lies just because someone damaged my prideful ego is ugly wicked behavior and not what you want for me.  Forgive me Father for this behavior and as I repent, keep my jumping limited to your lap for solace and refuge when I am honestly wounded by another's actions or words.  Keep my heart and my eyes fixed on you Lord always.  "Take away the disgrace I dread, for your laws are good." Psalm 119:39.  And for those whom I have accused Father, please give me the courage me to confess to them my sin, seek forgiveness and I pray blessings for them.  As for my sympathetic supporters let them see what a "Clouseau" I am Lord and give them the grace to forgive me as well.  In Jesus name I pray.  AMEN
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